How about a shotgun approach, instead?
- The doctor’s office that put me on my current pain medication regimen has decided that I am a drug seeker, because I am seeing a holistic Lyme specialist. My Lyme specialist can write prescriptions, but prefers not to for narcotics. Thus, I see my regular doctor for those refills. My attempt 2 weeks ago to get everyone on the same page led to the resident (wait for it…) psych consult (whom I was stuck with at the last minute, due to a scheduling error) to verbally and emotionally abuse me. Forrest saw it all, and he suggested we never go there again. I’ve written a letter of complaint (I have to wait until Tuesday to send it, because I’m getting confirmation receipt on it…two copies are going out; one to the head doctor, and one to the office manager), which also includes the updates to my chart that the NP didn’t bother writing down because she was too busy berating me, aaaaand…I’ll go there if I have a cold from now on. It’s noted that I am never to see that NP again in my chart, but you know me…I can’t let someone in a position like THAT abuse patients. There’s a class on that in nursing school – it specifically says to not badger people you suspect of drug-seeking, but to diffuse the situation and refer them to your boss. She didn’t do that, needless to say. I’m seeking no legal retribution…I just want it noted.
- They referred me to a pain specialist, but the initial visit costs over $250, and HA HA, I have no job right now, so I told them I’d look them up when I could afford them. Then THEY said, “Well, there ARE clinics where pain doctors will just write you prescriptions, but we’re not one of those places.” I made it clear that PT, diet, and anything EXCEPT steroid shots would be fine with me, and that I wasn’t just blowing smoke up their asses when I said that I had their information and would contact them when I could afford it. What IS it with people? For fuck’s sake.
- I’d like to point out that I don’t have any issues NOT taking my pain meds – the thing is, right now I take them for my cramps. My hip HAS been feeling better. My pain is so generalized that the ibuprofen 800 that I take twice per day actually seems to be helping, somewhat. It doesn’t matter that I tried to say this to the NP, though – she made her assumption the second I told her about my Lyme doctor, and that I was trying to get everyone on the same page, and proceeded to just be a heinous bitch to me. YOUR OFFICE puts me on a medical regimen that, at least for what it’s prescribed for, is working, and because I haven’t changed my story in 6 months, that makes me a problem all of a sudden? Oh…wait…it’s because my Lyme doctor’s weaning me off of stuff, and you don’t like that, do you? Well, too bad, bitch, because I FEEL BETTER.
- Uh, yeah. That’s another thing. While right now I’m physically exhausted (because of the emotional toll of losing JW, as well as from my current detox from Cymbalta – more on that in a bit), I FEEL better. I mean, I’m having fun digestive issues with my new diet, because it’s limited, and I haven’t figured it out, yet (also, I’m cheating, because I’m an emotional eater, and hello, I’ve been through some emotional crap lately), but in general, not being on Neurontin and Lexapro seems to have made absolutely no difference, except to give my liver a break, which it apparently needed. I’m weaning off of the Cymbalta right now, which is a pain in the ass, because I’m HOLY SHIT MANIC OMG I WANT TO PAAAAAAINT SOMETHING CAN I SING? CAN I? PLEASE? YOU PROMISE IT WON’T BOTHER YOU IF I SING? LALALALALALALA!, and I’m having parathesia (look it up – it’s basically like having tiny needles shoved into your face around your mouth and cheeks) and dizzy spells to beat the band, but I’m sucking it up, and I’m doing it. I went from 30mg every night to 30mg every other night (for a week), and now I’m doing 30mg every 3rd night (for four cycles), after which I’m stopping completely. THEN I’m weaning off of the Trazodone. I’m not sure how that’s going to work. I’m only on 50mg (which the NP helpfully pointed out was a ridiculously low dose, and that I really should be raising it if I want results, rather than relying on my Lyme doctor, whom she called, and I quote “…kind of a quack, to me”), and I can’t imagine that more than a week of breaking them in half is going to be necessary. I already feel like shit a lot of the time…what are a few withdrawal symptoms on top of it, ya know?
- I’m still hovering around the same weight I have been for the past…let’s see…3 months. Not gaining is good. I’m trying to be positive about that, but I still feel gross.
- All signs of MRSA-related abscess-like behavior on my body are GONE. WOOOOO!
- Y’ALL, if you’re EVER on Cymbalta, and you have to go off of it, MAKE SURE YOU ASK YOUR DOC FOR A MUSCLE RELAXER. I’m completely serious. My Valium has kind of saved my life these past two days. I’m manic, but can’t do much, because I’m exhausted, so it leads to this full-body buzzing feeling and a shitload of irritation. It’s like PMS turned up to 11. My body’s like, “Uh, serotonin, plskthx?”, and is throwing a full-on tantrum now that it’s not getting any. You know, like a frat boy at a party where the keg’s run dry.
- The scar under my armpit has officially reached the “ugh, what HAPPENED stage?” instead of the “oh, what’d you do there?” stage. You know what I mean…it looks like a generic scar, rather than a surgery scar. Like I fell on the corner of a table and happened to cut my armpit open. Which sounds like something that would have happened as a kid, but notsomuch now.
- My kidneys are kind of unhappy. When mixed with my hormones, I look like those photos I posted earlier, with the puffy face and whatnot. I’m hoping that sort of straightens out as I get medication things taken care of, and am better able to stick to my diet (which includes, naturally, more water than I’m currently drinking, though I’m drinking more water than I was, say, 2 weeks ago, so that’s a start).
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand I’m done boring you. I can’t go into a whole lot of detail with what’s going on with me lately, just because there’s so much of it, that I have a hard time getting it all out in an understandable way. So those of you who continue to read, seriously, BLESS YOU. I know I’m a pill right now. I’m working on it.