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Calmer.

I talked to my friend, who was diagnosed with ALS before he was finally discovered to have Lyme disease (like, they gave him 6 months to live, he can’t get a job because a doctor once told him he was terminal, etc. – it was rough), and who also happens to be the guy I borrowed my wheelchair from (because of the aforementioned ALS diagnosis, he used it for a while, himself), and expressed my concerns, because I’m in a REALLY bad way, right now.

Fevers at random, severe weakness, shakes, heart palpitations, really low blood pressure, nausea (vomiting regularly at night), feeling cold, pain every-freakin’-where, etc.  It’s horrible.

And on top of that, it hurts to talk, and my brain will regularly tell my mouth “no” in the middle of saying something, so I’ve just been using a TTV online program around the house, because it’s easier.  I talked to my friend, yes, and now my face is completely numb and feels like it’s going to fall off.  Blech.

The fact that he’s been freakin’ pronounced as terminal, and is now able to take care of a good number of things (despite his relapses, which are just a thing that happen), makes him the idea person to go to when I need a perspective check.

I ticked off my symptoms, and he smiled and told me that sounded about right, meaning yes, this is a thing that happens during Lyme treatment, and it’s basically just a severe herx.

He had the same symptoms manifest on an airplane. So that’s fun to think about.

Anyway, this is another hurdle. It just IS. And there’s not really anything I can do but power through it, so that’s what I’m going to do.  I’m going to see if I can get another Lyme test next month (since that’s when I should have insurance, again – long story), and see if those little buggers are active enough to tip off the “official” Lyme test, and base future treatments on that.

I just have to regroup.

…again.

.

6 comments to Calmer.

  • shtinky

    i’m so glad you have people close with answers for you.

    happy v.d.!

  • Joseph

    Keep on Keepin’ on. It seems to be all you can do, though I do wish you were past this.

    • “It is what it is” is something I frequently say to people.

      I can’t wait until I’m past this…there will always be something, because relapse, but in general? Things have to be able to get better than this.

  • When it comes to chronic illnesses all you can do is keep pushing to the next goal. The alternative is unacceptable. You got the right attitude, and yes I believe things can be better than they are now.

    Famous movie quote I think of when quitting gets tempting: “Don’t give the prick the satisfaction.”

    • “The alternative is unacceptable.” YES. I completely agree.

      No matter what happens, I’m going to try my best to keep looking forward. So far, there’s been a solution to nearly everything, even if that solution may take a while or may not be ideal. It’s still a solution, and still MUCH better than giving up.

      <3